There are things that we sometimes have to let go of. I have been finding myself feeling sad the last few days. I always ask myself what this might be about so I can air it out and give it the space it needs. I realized today that I have been holding back some of my happiness when I think about being in a relationship. I have been holding back because I feel bad...I am struggling to let go of being a single friend and now a dating friend.
There is a sisterhood that I have been a part of that I have to let go of. Being a part of a group of single friends has been a huge part of surviving in singleness and now I have to allow that part of my life to change. I think in my heart a part of me feels slightly guilty for all the time I spend with my boyfriend and not pursuing other relationships, I feel guilty that I don't have as much time to pour into some amazing women in my life, and I feel guilty because right now I just want to spend as much time as possible with my boyfriend because we don't live in the same town.
Some people might not understand why I would be sad about leaving singleness and I would love to give you a list of all the amazing things I have been able to do and enjoy in my singleness...but what makes me the most sad is having to leave some of my "sisters" in singleness, especially those who I know want to leave it as well. I feel a divide coming between me and some of my friends and then wonder if it is about my new relationship status or just where we are in our relationship.
So I just want to say Thank You to all the amazing women I have lived with, laughed with, and cried with. To all of you who have traveled with me on this journey and helped me learn how to survive in singleness. I am a better woman today because of all of you. You have always been there for me and I hope you know I will still always be here for you. You are amazing and I love you.
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